Moving & Learning Along the Way

Learning the Way of St. James

(If you are new to Coffee, Crafts & Conversation, here is the basis of my recent posts: My next great adventure is beginning on July 10th, 2016 when I'll be flying to Spain for the summer. July & August will be spent with a wonderful family serving as their aupair and the last month I'll be hiking El Camino de Santiago [which is a 500 mile pilgrimage] through the country with a friend.)

In order to be honest about this season of excitement, expectation and uncertainty - I want to share what was put on my heart the last couple of days.

In addition to flying over to Spain for the summer, I am moving out of my current apartment and into a new one. I've been preparing my belongings, planning the next steps, donating clothes, moving boxes and this week my brother and boyfriend moved my dressers and bed out.

As I was putting together my last box and packing up my clothes for the summer, there was a lot of huffing & puffing... Not physically but emotionally. My little sister kept asking, "Are you doing okaaaaay?" (She nannies 3 year olds so this is a normal conversation for her...) Oddly, I felt sad and hesitant to leave..

So... In spite of my feelings, I pulled my suitcases up the stairs, loaded my car and drove away.

That night, sitting by the pool at my parents house, I was asking God why I was feeling upset/overwhelmed. In the last 4 months of prepping, this is the first time I've had any type of negative feelings. God poked my spirit and pointed out that leaving my current place makes my life shifts so much more real! With the season of uncertainty beginning.

Uncertainty means no control. It means learning trust.

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This shift got me thinking about James, the Apostle who we are walking the Camino in honor of.

James' family was in the business of fishing. He was in a boat with his dad & brother, John, when Jesus called James & John into Ministry with Him [Mt 4:21-22]. The bible says that James IMMEDIATELY dropped everything and began following and serving Jesus.

James was eager to be called! Eager to fulfill his purpose. So eager that he left his family's business, left his father and the places he was most comfortable with.

James becomes one of Jesus' closest friends and part of the inner circle along with John & Peter. James, John & Peter witnessed Jesus' transfiguration [Mk 9:2-13], saw Elijah and Moses and heard the voice of God [Mk 9:2-13], had a lot of personal time with Jesus [Mk 9:2-13, Mk 1:29], witnessed MANY miracles including healing, deliverance and raising people from the dead [Mk 5:37-43]. James went with Jesus to the Garden of Gethsemane the night Jesus was arrested [Mt 26:37] and saw Jesus after the resurrection [Jn 20:19-20].

Maybe James had hesitated in the past and missed opportunities but when Jesus invited him on His journey in Mt 4:21-22, James did not hesitate.

Studying James encourages me to go boldly towards where God calls - this is the Way of St. James!! Serve well, ask questions, honor God and He will bring you to places you never could have imagined.

All this to say, I am James. and I hope you are too!

XOXO,

Abby

Who is Ezekiel? Who am I?

"He said to me, “Son of man,[a] stand up on your feet and I will speak to you.”2 As he spoke, the Spirit came into me and raised me to my feet, and I heard him speaking to me. 3 He said: “Son of man, I am sending you..."" [Ezekial 2:1-3a]

Since I was 5 I have been searching for my purpose. I remember being a pre-teen asking my dad, "What am I here for? What is the point? What should I do with my life?" He answered, "Hm, 6th grade is your purpose right now."

This search for purpose, having a plan and being used has not gone away. Actually, it is increasingly becoming more and more a part of my daily life as each day, week, month, and year passes. 

I was sitting in my War Chair this morning (if you haven't seen the movie War Room, rent it tonight and find yourself a War Room, War Corner or War Chair).. so I was sitting in my War Chair this morning praying, or shamelessly begging, to hear from God. 
The name Ezekiel popped into my head. 
I pushed it away thinking, "Oh, I overheard Debbie talking about him... GOD, speak to me!" 
Popped back in my mind: "Ezekiel."
I thought, "Hmm.. who is Ezekiel?"
"Ezekiel."
Okay, I get it. 

My bible quickly opened up to the book of Ezekiel who was a Prophet from the Old Testament. The first chapter is about a vision he has of mystical creatures who have a 4-sided head, wings, extra eyeballs and bazaar features that are worshipping God in Heaven. This is not exactly what I was looking for when seeking purpose, encouragement and healing.

BUT the first part of Chapter 2 hit me to the core.

"This was the appearance of the likeness of the glory of the Lord. When I saw it, I fell facedown, and I heard the voice of one speaking. 1 He said to me, “Son of man,[a] stand up on your feet and I will speakto you.” 2 As he spoke, the Spirit came into me and raised me to my feet, and I to my feet, and I heard him speaking to me. 3 He said: “Son of man, I am sending you...""

[Ezekiel 1:28b-2:1-3a]

Ezekiel saw what appeared to be the likeness of the glory of the Lord and fell facedown in awe & wonder. He didn't see God, he saw what looked like the glory of Him! Can you imagine how magnificent that was?!  BUT then it got better - God starting speaking to him. The Lord instructed Ezekiel to stand in order to hear what He had to say but Ezekiel wasn't able to stand on his own. Maybe he was scared, unsure of what he heard or he wasn't listening (um, man ears?)... either way, Ezekiel didn't move a muscle. "AS HE SPOKE", the bible says, "the Spirit came into me and raised me." God gave Ezekiel an instruction that He knew Ezekiel couldn't do on his own SO THAT God could help him succeed.

God poked my heart. As we humble ourselves before the thorn in adoration and genuine awe, the Lord will 1) instruct, 2) help 3) speak & 4) send.

If I were in Ezekiel's sandals, I think the biggest lesson learned from this moment would be the sovereign power of God. To realize He is the One who possesses supreme and ultimate power; to trust that He knows us better than we know ourselves. God knew that Ezekiel would need help before he asked - as God spoke the words, "stand up to your feet" the Spirit came along side to help fulfill the words of the Lord. The Spirit put him in the place God needed him to be to receive his blessing. 

What does that mean for us? 
As a Christian, we are part of God's family, part of a great plan.
Similar to Ezekiel, we can trust that God will guide us into and through His perfect will AND that He'll help us along the way. Sometimes that means not getting the job, losing a friend along the journey or being held back when you are trying to push forward. I believe that God DOES give us more than we can handle SO THAT He can help us succeed. 

I hope you find the same encouragement from this that I do. Knowing that I am often unprepared to move forward although desperately wanting to, that I'm not where I want to be but far from where I started, finding hope and trust that God is helping to bring me where He has called me.

God's purpose for our life is way bigger than we could ever dream or imagine if we let Him lead the way!


Pray with me::

Oh, Sovereign God, thank you for caring enough about us to give us the gift of free will. Thank you for walking along side us as we navigate through our greatest adventure, life. We want nothing more than to be at the center of Your perfect plan. As we worship You, I ask that You'll fill our hearts with You love and our minds with dreams, visions and ideas.

We give you our lives. Thank you, Father. 

In Your perfect name we pray together, Amen.